Sigh....

The hasty movement of time indicates and delineates many things to me. It's somehow horrifying to know that something as latent as time exists and is faster than lighting. Consider it as my personal point of view, the feeling of helpless or being unable to make something turns better is showing its presence to me day by day, or worst, its starting to be part of my choice. Time is really too fast. Flash. That's the speed. However, what makes it even faster is that it seems to be slow to everyone, causing one to think that one has plenty of time and thus, tends to waste it. That is what that increase the speed as well as the cruelty of time.
I have this feeling is because I reluctantly but surely feel that I am running out of time. I refuse to allow this idea owns me because I can't accept this fact. Of course, I am trying and urging myself to do my very best with all the obligations around me, suffocating and restricting my every move, directing me onto a narrow path.
Take a close look into my life and you will notice the main elements in me now: studies and basketball. Studies is the main and utmost important task which requires and consume lots of my attention and energy. About basketball, I am having this competition on the 12th of April. To be honest, the outcome of this competition won't be as satisfying as I lied to myself. I know that but many friends of mine are involved and I can't just ignore their request for my involvement. Consider it as my last year in school, I decided to give it my best shot. But in the process of the preparation and training, I find it rather time consuming and the worst is that the time is not consumed in a good manner. Wasted. The time is wasted. I am saying this because basketball, as everyone knows, is a team sport. You basically need 5 players on the floor for the game to commence, not counting the bench players which would sum up to 12. Now the problem that is really causing a serious headache is that the member of the team don't show subordination and discipline. They do not train well, do not show up for practise, do not take heed to advices and they think they are skilful. So every single one of these things sum up and produces nothing but failure. We will definitely lose but, as I mentioned above, I am just doing this under the request of my friends. But I can't deny that I keep impugning over my decision. The question about my realisation of failure ahead of me and yet I am still wasting time to achieve success keeps pondering in my head, unwilling to make a leave. And so, the question still remains, why am I doing this??????

That's one of the thing that is bothering me for the mean while.

Talking about social circle, I admit that I have lost a friend that was once one of my best friends as I considered. But somehow, my involvement in various aspects has placed me in a situation where I tend to neglect him. At the end, he left me without leaving any notes or saying goodbye. Well, I consider it as a basic manner when you are leaving some place without notifying the owner and yet he failed to do so. I place my friends at a high level in my life. Losing one without me knowing it really hurts me a lot. I keep thinking about him, the factors that contribute to the happening of this event. Seconds, minutes, hours, days, weeks, months have passed without me not thinking about him. As a candid statement, I tormented myself a lot. But in the end, the words of God are the best. I was reading Proverbs until I realised a verse that relieved me a lot. The verse said, 1)how long will scoffers delight in their scoffing and fools hate knowledge? (Proverbs 1:22) 2) because I have called and you refused, have stretched out my hand and no one heeded (Proverbs 1:24) 3) I also will laugh at your calamity; I will mock when panic strikes you (Proverbs 1:26) 4) Then they will call upon me, but I will not answer; they will seek me diligently but will not find me. ( Proverbs 1:28).
And so, a remedy presented itself right in front of me. I grinned at this verse, thanking this awesome God at the same time. Amen... This is what I will do when he seeks my help in the time to come....

Academically, the exam is arriving next week. Study... Study... Study... I think that's all I have to do. Hard-working, diligent, perpetual efforts... Though it seems quite simple, following all these virtues is definitely something tough....

And so, I end this post with my blessings to those who are facing the same predicaments as I am, hoping that they would get their own solutions for their respective problems...