Friday, March 5, 2010

Lameness RULE

Today, a new kingdom is born . The politics of this kingdom is simple. It consists of a king and a general. That's all. Simple?? Yes. Useless?? Definitely not as this kingdom has gained many territories in just one day.

Introducing, the unique, the powerful, the mighty kingdom: LAMENESS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Well~ The name of that kingdom is Lameness. Everything is built on lameology. The king is known as Lame King and the general is Lame General. Despite the peculiar name, the king is wise and brutal. He would seize any chances available to conquer a nation. The nations which I meant are among us. The nations which I really meant are the emotions, situation, circumstances and outcome of a certain event. Whenever something is wrong, Lame King would be there, with Lame General at his side to command and conquer.

Never!!! Never underestimate his power and wisdom for either you or I would be conquered easily in a swift. You might say that I have overestimated his power and abilities. Thus, let me share with you an experience whereby I lost everything I have to Lame King.

ONCE upon a time, in a far far away country, known as Malaysia, in a small small city, known as Penang, in a very very small town, known as Nibong Tebal, Lame King decided to appear once more in public after being in solitude for a considerable duration. The first target of his is in SMKSN. To his opinion, this place, or known as "school" by the earthly being, has lots of potential for him to establish his lame policy. He likes it. Oh yes, he likes it a lot. As long as lame blood is running in his lame veins,lame artery and lame capillary, he was determined to conquer this planet Earth and make it into planet LAME. Having this idea in his mind always made him smile lamely.

And so, after waiting and waiting for the correct opportunity, he discovered that a young innocent boy who has the tendency to be his second Lame General was in the school. Never miss an opportunity, he said to himself. Thus, he dispatched his best lame troops, known as the Unbeatable Lames, to follow and extract information concerning this young boy.

Reports were quick to his knowledge. He found out that not long after there would be an event where lame beings will be running and jumping around on a green carpet. He also knew that the lame Sun would be there as an audience. By knowing that, he was eager to prove his power and might to the lame Sun. So, without further consideration, he called out for his general, "Lame General, I, the Lame King, has a lame task for lame you. Will lame you accept it with lameness?" " I will be lame to accept it, my all mighty lame Lord," answered the general lamely. And so, he rode his black lame horse out to accomplish his task. For your information, the task was to conquer this boy's heart and turn it into lameness. The general knew that this is something simple which he would carry out easily and claim his rewards. He grinned lamely.

He, then, went into the compounds of the school. He felt happy at his first glance. The weather was lamely hot. He was happy. Earthly beings were sitting in the canteen doing nothing but feeling boring and lame. He was happy. Everything seemed suitable for him to take action but he reminded himself what the Lame King ordered him to do. He seek for the boy and spotted him immediately.

He saw the boy going to the opposite side of the green carpet and spoke to a teacher who was in a lame mood. He was again, happy. He listened to boy attentively, surprised that the boy didn't notice his presence. He then discovered that the boy was supposed to do some running competition today but the teacher didn't allow him to because there was a substitution made. The other guy who was substituting him didn't attend any practises or any tryouts. The boys felt down and disappointed. The general was happy to know that cause these were the important elements for lameness.

Not long after that, the boy went to take a white box and a rectangular box. The general was curious were those boxes, will they jeopardise his mission???

His worries was replaced with satisfaction after knowing that the white and rectangular box consisted only of food and drinks which Earthly beings needed for their body, like a battery.
Suddenly, another Earthly being stood in the boys way. The general found out that that being was a woman. The "woman" ordered the boy to return the boxes because it wasn't the correct time to consume this food. The boy was surprised and started to explain that other people were doing the same thing. He also said that he has pictures of people eating as a prove. Then, the woman gave him a fake smile and returned to her original expression. The boy felt disgusted and walked off, without showing anything to her. The general felt anger and outraged within the boy. He was again, happy. Things are proceeding as planned.

The boy finished up his "battery" and went playing basketball with his other friends. Lame General waited with endurance for everything to over because he understood that the boy loved that game a lot.

After about 3 hours, the Lame General thought that it was time to act. He took out his lame sword and ran into war inside the boy.

After a bloody war, the general was inside the boy's heart, manipulating it. Upon that, the boy sat down and said, " Today is really lame. Wasted my time. I feel lame."


-Mission accomplished-

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

maileh u...all say bout today is lame day...kn u...stil say 2day is a lame day...read dis blog is more lame ok?sad to u,lucasttw

mqkang said...

==
real lame
haha

Niel said...

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lucas said...

LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Mighty LAME

Anonymous said...

hahahahahahahahahahahaha!lame!hahahahahahahahahahahaha!