~Cause it's us against the world
You and me against them all
If you listen to these words
Know that we are standing tall
I don't ever see the day that
I won't catch you when you fall
Cause it's us against the world
Tonight~
It's has been very confusing lately. Friends come and go, time hasten without limit. Sigh.. Yet the responsibilities on me didn't seem to lessen. Studies, duties... For the first time I find it hard to describe something. Do you know the feeling when you are stuck between something especially when that thing is inexplicable?
I am having this sort of feeling right now.
Once I did think that going to school is an utter waste of valuable time but as things around me started to circulate, I realised that I am totally in a different situation. Now, school times passed quickly, maybe too fast. For some time, I was surrounded by noises and laughters but unknowingly, I am getting more and more lonely. And this time, it's what I desired. I just want to get out of the crowd and be with my own. That kind of feeling is really.... confusing... Sometimes it left me on a certain spot where I find myself in somewhere unknown to me.
Not long ago, I found myself lamenting over my situation where I am not welcomed amongst people around me. But, it's different currently. Too different. I mean, there are some opposite sexes who are interested in me and they wanted to know more about me. Well, if everything went smoothly, there would be no problems but.. but.. haiz.. just but... Well, guys interested in girls or the other way round is something very natural especially for teenagers like us. We tend to have unusual ties with the opposite sex but it would be foolish if we go beyond that boundary. Liking someone is a privilege and it shouldn't be turned into something disastrous. After all, our feeling towards that person doesn't give us any special rights to do things the way we wanted it to be. Basically we are still friends. So, I feel quite troubled when some girls tend to be nicer to me all of a sudden. What I think is that why you have to be like that? We are still and just friends... Don't know why this sort of thing would also bother me... sigh..
One more thing which even more troubling is the coming exam. Before this, I did have the form and mood to study but as it's getting near, I tend to lose everything. Can't and don't feel like studying now. So, sigh.. ...
=ended=
Saturday, May 15, 2010
Saturday, April 24, 2010
Looking back
Here ends the hectic life. What I love about such competitions is the outcome of it. In the whole process, hectic is something unavoidable and the result of it would be frustration or even the desire to give up.
The clock ticked at a same pace but who knows, it has been ticking since the Earth was formed. 3 weeks have passed. This time, I realise the hastiness and did try to negotiate with the time but the negotiation never took place. It still goes on like before. The first week was U.P 1, following by basketball and ping pong competition then debate competition.
For the first time in my 5 years of secondary life, I did prepare for U.P. I bore in mind that this year is SPM-year, ain't no kidding man. And so I studied with that reminder in mind. I got a a bearable result, 2nd in the class >.^. But then I realised that my friends around me were not slowing down in any way. They were fighting very hard to achieve victory for this coming battle. By knowing that, I felt blessed and honoured to be with them in the same class, at least they can be my pushing force.
After that, it's the basketball competition. Well, this didn't turn out so well. My teammates, 12 of them, didn't really have the heart for training. Well, maybe it's because the training is indeed tough but it's just simply ridiculous if you want to go for competition and yet you don't want to train. So, my mood for this competition wasn't that pleasant. As a way to fill my time with meaningful events, I trained myself, following with me were some of my fellow friends. Candidly speaking, I didn't had much nice time back then, maybe I did increase a bit in my basketball skills.
However, I emphasized a lot in the coming ping pong competition which is just one day after the basketball competition. I trained with Zhen Kai, Eric and Shao Han at the small house opposite my house. We also made our new T-shirt which I liked it a lot. We trained and trained and trained. In the process, of course we understood each other more. Overall I had a pleasant time during the whole training process.
After the ping pong competition, debate preparations owned my entire mind. By then, I was mentally tired. After all those trainings and competitions, I didn't have the will to continue on another sort of competition which needed ample time and preparations. And, this year, except from me, the other two speakers were "green" ones. The first speaker, Dania, was a form 1, the second speaker was Shantini. All of them didn't even know the rules or what to do. You want to know how things turned up to be like that? Well, let me tell you. Usually, there will be two reserves every year. So there were two last year whom will be in the front line this year. But, the two of them, Vivian and Mazrina, they backed out. They gave excuses like this year is SPM, very busy, very nervous kind of bull shit. I was VERY pissed off and it did affect my passion towards this debate competition. But, thanks to Shantini as she was indeed a very good companion, everything turned out to be very well. Though the both of us only had a week together, we talked together as if we were friends for many years. I liked talking to her and she I. We shared our problems to one another, shared our opinion and our likings. So after the competition, we became close friends. We enjoyed each other's company a lot, we even appreciated it. ^^ Never would I thought that I would have a girl friend so close and understanding. Hmmm.. It's nice talking to her.
Well, if you did notice, I was just mentioning the process of those competitions. So let me inform you the results of it.
Basketball- Didn't get anything
Ping Pong- Silver medal for team, Bronze for double and gain friendship
Debate- Didn't win but gained a true friend
So I guess for those three competitions, I enjoyed debate the most, though I failed to get the best speaker or the first or second place.
These are almost everything of these few weeks life.
The clock ticked at a same pace but who knows, it has been ticking since the Earth was formed. 3 weeks have passed. This time, I realise the hastiness and did try to negotiate with the time but the negotiation never took place. It still goes on like before. The first week was U.P 1, following by basketball and ping pong competition then debate competition.
For the first time in my 5 years of secondary life, I did prepare for U.P. I bore in mind that this year is SPM-year, ain't no kidding man. And so I studied with that reminder in mind. I got a a bearable result, 2nd in the class >.^. But then I realised that my friends around me were not slowing down in any way. They were fighting very hard to achieve victory for this coming battle. By knowing that, I felt blessed and honoured to be with them in the same class, at least they can be my pushing force.
After that, it's the basketball competition. Well, this didn't turn out so well. My teammates, 12 of them, didn't really have the heart for training. Well, maybe it's because the training is indeed tough but it's just simply ridiculous if you want to go for competition and yet you don't want to train. So, my mood for this competition wasn't that pleasant. As a way to fill my time with meaningful events, I trained myself, following with me were some of my fellow friends. Candidly speaking, I didn't had much nice time back then, maybe I did increase a bit in my basketball skills.
However, I emphasized a lot in the coming ping pong competition which is just one day after the basketball competition. I trained with Zhen Kai, Eric and Shao Han at the small house opposite my house. We also made our new T-shirt which I liked it a lot. We trained and trained and trained. In the process, of course we understood each other more. Overall I had a pleasant time during the whole training process.
After the ping pong competition, debate preparations owned my entire mind. By then, I was mentally tired. After all those trainings and competitions, I didn't have the will to continue on another sort of competition which needed ample time and preparations. And, this year, except from me, the other two speakers were "green" ones. The first speaker, Dania, was a form 1, the second speaker was Shantini. All of them didn't even know the rules or what to do. You want to know how things turned up to be like that? Well, let me tell you. Usually, there will be two reserves every year. So there were two last year whom will be in the front line this year. But, the two of them, Vivian and Mazrina, they backed out. They gave excuses like this year is SPM, very busy, very nervous kind of bull shit. I was VERY pissed off and it did affect my passion towards this debate competition. But, thanks to Shantini as she was indeed a very good companion, everything turned out to be very well. Though the both of us only had a week together, we talked together as if we were friends for many years. I liked talking to her and she I. We shared our problems to one another, shared our opinion and our likings. So after the competition, we became close friends. We enjoyed each other's company a lot, we even appreciated it. ^^ Never would I thought that I would have a girl friend so close and understanding. Hmmm.. It's nice talking to her.
Well, if you did notice, I was just mentioning the process of those competitions. So let me inform you the results of it.
Basketball- Didn't get anything
Ping Pong- Silver medal for team, Bronze for double and gain friendship
Debate- Didn't win but gained a true friend
So I guess for those three competitions, I enjoyed debate the most, though I failed to get the best speaker or the first or second place.
These are almost everything of these few weeks life.
Thursday, April 15, 2010
Goodbye
For the past few weeks, a tiny orange ball kept floating in my head. Its' presence was, then, undeniable. Every time I hold that ball in my palm, I regard it as my friend. I have been together with it for 6 years... 6 long years and it had brought me many sweet memories....
It did it again, for the last time....
I finished my ping pong competition with one silver medal and one bronze medal. It's not about the medals but I can't stop thinking and believing that this would be the last year for me to play in a MSSPP competition. My last year.... And so, it had became my past, my story, one of my play on the stage... It was part of my life back then but now, it escaped away from me, meaning that I have lost a part of my life. Will something new come in to replace it???
I am gonna miss you buddy... I haven't been very grateful to you but no doubt, you presence and place in my heart was, is and will not be replaced. Along with it came the sound of cheers and roars of support. Every year I would be in a hall, filled with blue tables, players from other schools and my buddy would be there. I have tasted victory and failure which taught me a lot in life through my buddy. I have won a state player before... ^^... And, every year, I would have a nice time with my friends and seniors in that hall. Friendship was established through the whole process. Yet, next year onwards, everything ends.....
I miss it...
I miss it...
It did it again, for the last time....
I finished my ping pong competition with one silver medal and one bronze medal. It's not about the medals but I can't stop thinking and believing that this would be the last year for me to play in a MSSPP competition. My last year.... And so, it had became my past, my story, one of my play on the stage... It was part of my life back then but now, it escaped away from me, meaning that I have lost a part of my life. Will something new come in to replace it???
I am gonna miss you buddy... I haven't been very grateful to you but no doubt, you presence and place in my heart was, is and will not be replaced. Along with it came the sound of cheers and roars of support. Every year I would be in a hall, filled with blue tables, players from other schools and my buddy would be there. I have tasted victory and failure which taught me a lot in life through my buddy. I have won a state player before... ^^... And, every year, I would have a nice time with my friends and seniors in that hall. Friendship was established through the whole process. Yet, next year onwards, everything ends.....
I miss it...
I miss it...
Monday, April 12, 2010
Part and parcels of life
And so, the match between Seri Nibong and Jit Sin has ended. We lost. We lost terribly. I won't say that we have done enough in this match. As a matter of fact, we didn't do anything that is worth calling "enough". But, a lost is a lost. No point saying that we have overcome ourself, we have confidence.. bla bla bla.. All those emo stuffs won't change the fact, we lost.
Jit Sin was a great team. They were strong, fast and brutal. They owned every rights to win during the match. When I saw the difference between the points getting further, I knew that we would lose for sure. Physically, my team wasn't competent enough. Talking about basketball IQ, we don't have any as we don't have a coach. What's worst is we have many players who can't differentiate between walking and dribbling, including me myself. HAHAHAHA.. ( have to admit it or else people would say that I am proud. )For example, there is one guy on my team, a very cute and adorable one who thinks that he is good enough. Well, as long as you have confidence, we won't say anything. Usually when he plays, he commits many fouls but deny all of them, saying that we are nonsense or bullshitting. Then, during the match, the referee caught him with a foul but he turned to us and asked :"Is that a foul?"
Wakakakakakakaka.. I was infuriated by then but now, thinking back, I can't stop laughing. HAHAHAHAHAA.. So ignorant and stupid... hahahaha.. Well, if any of you know who is this guy, better don't tell him or he will tell the girls.. kakaakakakaka
All right all right. Stop laughing. Excuse me guys...
Now, our lost caused some great deal to some of our players, like Zhen Kai and I. The others I wasn't sure as they just lost last week so they might have been used to it. Zhen Kai and I love basketball and we want to be above other players but, just like my brother said, the situation wasn't friendly to us. So, let it be, we can't do anything about it. But Zhen Kai, he was really down after the game. I can't blame him for that. But I kept telling him and myself, we are better in other prospects. Hehehe.. Maybe by saying that, we can feel better.
This game is just a small fraction of this year. I am going to have my ping pong competition this Wednesday. This, I can win and I will win. LoL. After that, debate competition. All these, seriously, is like having 5 children at the same time, keeping me as busy as I can afford to be. But bear in mind, I still have SPM ahead of me. By having this idea is like a burning flame inside my mind.. I will work hard for it, for my future and for the hope of my family....
Jit Sin was a great team. They were strong, fast and brutal. They owned every rights to win during the match. When I saw the difference between the points getting further, I knew that we would lose for sure. Physically, my team wasn't competent enough. Talking about basketball IQ, we don't have any as we don't have a coach. What's worst is we have many players who can't differentiate between walking and dribbling, including me myself. HAHAHAHA.. ( have to admit it or else people would say that I am proud. )For example, there is one guy on my team, a very cute and adorable one who thinks that he is good enough. Well, as long as you have confidence, we won't say anything. Usually when he plays, he commits many fouls but deny all of them, saying that we are nonsense or bullshitting. Then, during the match, the referee caught him with a foul but he turned to us and asked :"Is that a foul?"
Wakakakakakakaka.. I was infuriated by then but now, thinking back, I can't stop laughing. HAHAHAHAHAA.. So ignorant and stupid... hahahaha.. Well, if any of you know who is this guy, better don't tell him or he will tell the girls.. kakaakakakaka
All right all right. Stop laughing. Excuse me guys...
Now, our lost caused some great deal to some of our players, like Zhen Kai and I. The others I wasn't sure as they just lost last week so they might have been used to it. Zhen Kai and I love basketball and we want to be above other players but, just like my brother said, the situation wasn't friendly to us. So, let it be, we can't do anything about it. But Zhen Kai, he was really down after the game. I can't blame him for that. But I kept telling him and myself, we are better in other prospects. Hehehe.. Maybe by saying that, we can feel better.
This game is just a small fraction of this year. I am going to have my ping pong competition this Wednesday. This, I can win and I will win. LoL. After that, debate competition. All these, seriously, is like having 5 children at the same time, keeping me as busy as I can afford to be. But bear in mind, I still have SPM ahead of me. By having this idea is like a burning flame inside my mind.. I will work hard for it, for my future and for the hope of my family....
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