Holding the present, seeking the future.

As 2012 is coming to an end, I realize that my time as a student is gradually fading away as well.
The first two months back in Nibong Tebal had passed hastily. Most of my time had been filled with teaching, be it academic or music. The experience was great and rewarding. I don't regret for what I had been doing. However, I do hope to put up a new life for remaining two months ahead of me.
What should I do?
After another two months, which I am confident will pass pretty quickly, I will be on a plane back to Miri again. Back to my life as a student again. Ever since I took my first step on the land of Miri, my life has been split into two, one in East Malaysia, another in West Malaysia. For now, I have no idea which one suits me better or which one do I like more. As one of my friend had told me before, the grass on the other side is always greener. True.
Time is, yet again, running. As the Sun goes down, the stars go up. This whole system seems to be repeating itself perpetually yet the things and people around me do not seem to be the same every day. A friend today might be a stranger tomorrow. The inability to take control over time have made me feel helpless. There are so many things which I hope to accomplish but time is lacking.
If I were to fast forward to a few years from now, my friends and I will be leading a very different life. How different? How far will we deviate from our original form?
So many unknowns. So many variables. Yet, only God knows the actual equation of our life. An equation which will, eventually, equal to something.
Sigh..
What would it be if all of us have stayed in Never Land? Will it be better? Or worse?
In short, I can say that I am unwilling to participate in the race. I would rather lose without giving up a fight. Yet when I am on the track, I will never give up. I want to be be the best.......