it's December... around 11.30pm... Later in the morning at 6am, my parents would be going to Shanghai without me. Not that they don't want to bring me there but I got a camp to attend here. They will be there for one week and I won't be home for about 4 days. So the remaining days would have me to take care of the whole house.
I feel quite lonely but I think that this is the time for me to grow up, to be more independent. I won't make a mess or cause anything to collapse. I will take good care of this remote sanctuary. KAKAKA!!!
Sometimes I did some thinking. Next year I will be form 5. Will anything change? At first stage, the idea of changing didn't startled me that much. However, after some deep thinking, I began to feel terrified. These changes in front of me aren't that simple. For instance, I will be able to drive. Now, when I was very young and very naive, driving, to me, is like a game. Every time it will start like this, " Let's rock!!" and the car will like boost up and speed around with fires aside and dragons accompanying the whole vehicle. BULLSHIT. Utter nonsense. Now that I am so close to get my licence, I don't feel cool or what ever. Yet I feel scared and as if another huge rock just laid onto my shoulder. Driving would simply means that I will take half the duty of the house onto myself. I will need to be my father's first man to help him and if anything happens, I must be there to assist. What if I fail? Yucks, hate to think like that. My brother said that by thinking like that, I make myself steps away from being a girl. I guess he is right. I must be a MAN!!!!!!
No worries! All the rest of my days!!! kakaka
Second thing, I did some long chatting with my bro last night. We usually do that over some topics about our social circle and thoughts about some incidents. It was fun but this time is totally different. We talked about girlfriend. Of course, not me!!! KAKA!! My brother instead, the master of soloisme (don't know how to spell). He needs one. He doesn't need any more stupid ideals which would stop him from getting a girl. One of them would be like him thinking that he is untouchable and unacceptable by girls. Knock it off!!! Time for some change. Time to discuss which one to look and hook. Keke.. The whole discussion, though we didn't reach any conclusion or solution, was pretty nice! The feeling was fresh and new. I just like it.. Wish I could describe the feeling more...
So, each of us, including you there reading my blog, will grow a year older next year. In other words, we are one more step closer to our graves.. I like to think that way... Growing up is an opportunity and privilege for us to be someone different in all aspects. Appreciate it, open up yourself to the new surroundings and settings and one day, you will be dominating it.. Good luck!
3 comments:
haha~learning and growing...^^and time may change ppl's mind...in good or bad way..that is the matter..+U
thx thx
woit. lol
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