I am who I am

----Week 5----
It's been a busy week. Studies, test, side visits. All of these do hasten the motion of time. When time actually traveled in such a pace, I tend to question myself, where did my "last week" go? And often do I worry that time would catch me off-guard. Wasting my time was the last thing I would want to do.

So, how was week 5?

The answer to that would be GOOD!
Lately, I have indulged myself into volleyball. Well, the thing about this sport was that I played before during high school but wasn't good at it. Not good at all. Apart from not being good, volleyball, this particular sport, actually gave me quite a number of memories of my high school, SMKSN. When I played it here, I did feel a little bit nostalgic and some memories flew past my head, leaving me in a state of memory.

As a ping pong player, I found it hard to be well in this sport. Maybe I was not meant to play it. :(
However, since this was the sport that landed itself on my doorstep, I would train hard to be better. That's just who I am. Talking about this, I was grateful that I met one of the seniors here who was a really good player. He was good and nice in personality but too bad, he would be leaving after this semester. Hmmm.. I guessed fate was playing it's trick again, huh? Recently, I had been having meals with him, and through that, we shared our opinions and our encounters. I was honoured to have known someone like him. Bravo to our friendship!
My friends will be going back to their respective hometowns during the tuition free week. I would be all alone here. Well not entirely alone as some of them aren't going back. It's a shame that I can't take a flight home and have a peek at my family and friends. I do miss them. My thoughts are with them from time to time.

Facing a new problem lately. Well, maybe the word "problem" is too harsh a term but I can't come out with a better one. It's not very serious but friends around me keep reminding me about that. They keep telling me to let go of myself, which means to relax myself and enjoy. Some of them do think that I am too serious and hold on tightly to my thoughts. Well this is quite true sometimes.

Now, here is my answer for them: I am who I am. For those friendly advise who think that they wanna help me to be a better person, you are welcome. But for those who dislike, loathe or even hate me for who I am, sorry, you can get out of my life and find your place somewhere you belong.

I guess that's all.

P.S: Have to plan my time wisely for the coming holiday.

Update

---Week 3----
I have been here for almost a month. Nevertheless, not a day has passed without me thinking how is everyone back at Nibong Tebal. I miss you all a lot. I am very proud and honoured to have a group of close and good friends. Though between us there is a long distance, none of us failed to keep in touch with the other. We often update ourselves with each other's events and stuffs. Maybe two, or many, is better than one. Sometimes when I am bored or feel a little lonely, they are always there, in my heart. It seems like distance isn't a problem after all. ^^
University life is indeed very nice. People here have many fresh ideas. Creative and innovative. I guess that're the fundamental criteria of a university student. Yet, I still wonder, do I, now, look like a university student? You know, being physically small does mislead people to think that you are childish or whatsoever. But the funny thing that happens here is, friends of mine keep saying that I look old (mature would be a nicer word to describe). Honestly, I am glad and okay with it because people take you seriously when you look mature or serious to them. More and more I get to know that I resemble a lot of my father, more towards the quiet and serious side. My friends here can go really crazy and let go everything and they do urge me to do the same but I fail to convince them that I have already let go everything and I am fine right now. This leads to another problem which lately does trouble me. You see, there are many people in this world, thus the variety of liking and attitude. However, the majority of the population does have a mutual point: a lot of them love alcohol. Now, I am not trying to judge or point my finger to anyone. This is only a personal thought and it shall be so. These few days, my friends invite me to join them to the club and get some drinks. It is quite costly, given my current financial status. I do not agree with the idea immediately but of course, I am open for opinions and discussions. Then, there is good friend of mine who kind of lecture me about all these stuffs. According to him, if my memory still serves me right, clubbing and alcohols are like a tool to be sociable as well as to get to know more people. It is the best way to get to know more people and get yourselves more friends who, in return, will benefit you in times to come. Well, I do agree with that idea as my brother and father are doing so too. Being sociable is sometimes very important for certain criteria of people. Then I ask him, don't you feel uncomfortable after drinking it? He says yes, of course. According to him, people don't really like to drink. They just drink for the sake of drinking it, cause it is alcohol. That's when confusion strikes me. Since it is not nice to be drank, why force yourself to do it just so to get more friends? And, since most of the people agree to the fact that beer or some alcoholic beverages are unfriendly to our tongue, why do the world recognise drinking as a social event? I am sure there are much better beverages to be chosen. When I think about this, I judge myself to be immature and stupid. Great poets and warriors of the past see drinking as a way to inspire them or to prove that they are the better man. But, it is still not nice to drink, right? Why drink it then? Drinking something which you don't like but treat it as an act of champion doesn't sound right. It resembles the human nature of committing sin when we know pretty well that it is wrong. Just like what the great Paul said, it is hard to do good things and so easy to do bad things. People are clear that alcohol doesn't taste good, bad for health and very very expensive but just for the sake of it, they drink and brag about it.

This is the part that I don't agree. If alcohol is the main tool of entertainment, then a person with that life should be very monotonous. I do hope that my failure to grasp the definition of this whole clubbing thing will not tag me as someone who is anti-social or weird. I just have my own way of thinking. I always do.

Let's see what is in stored for me at week 4.

Update

----Week 2 ----
Everything is getting serious now. I really have to sink the idea of being a degree student in my mind ASAP! The work load is pilling up and let me assure you, these works are not ordinary "homework". Degree. Degree is something different. In this level of education, mugging can only bring you thus far. It's important to study smart which, for now, I need to establish. I am sure I will be there, in time.

Time lurks and creeps. I have spent three weeks here without me knowing it. Is time running too fast? Looking over my shoulders, I wonder what have I left behind. What I want for myself is to be someone successful. And now, here am I, staring up into the deep abyss of space and asking myself, am I on the right path? Nevertheless, I will find you, I promise. I will make the world believe that determination and perseverance will take anyone as far as they want.

My mum called me the other day. She asked me whether I missed home.

That was a good question. To say no to it was not true, yet to say yes would be discouraging myself to move ahead and live on with the life I have right now. I sometimes do wonder how did my parents manage to just leave home without looking back and fight on. This thought lead me to one statement which I made to my mum. I told her that it was quite good for someone to come from a broken family. Got what I mean? When your home is comfortable and cozy, you really don't feel like staying away from too long. But then I guess everyone has their own predicaments to overcome in order to achieve greatness.

My dear brothers, Daniel and Marcus, I miss them a lot. My big bro will be having an important exam 2 months from now. I do hope he will do well and will, of course, use his whole might to face it and excel in it. As for Marcus, I talked to him in the phone that day. His voice has changed. LOL. Hard to imagine that small kid growing up into a teenager. I do have many expectations for this kid but too bad I am now so far away from him. I pray that he will perform well in all his undertakings.

As for my friends back in my hometown, how are you guys? Everyone doing well? I do miss you guys a lot. Really. Right here in Curtin or you can Miri, most of the time I operate alone as things do go smoothly when I am alone. xD.

I will be having my semester break in the month of June.

See you guys.